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Stupid Celebrity Quotes
Last night we were watching a show that counted down the 40 dumbest celebrity quotes, it was pretty funny so I thought I would post some of them.
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."
- Miss Alabama, 1994 Miss USA Pageant
"Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researches also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are."
- Mat Lauer, Today Show, NBC
"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law."
- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.
"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."
- Brooke Shields
"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president."
- Hillary Clinton
"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."
- Charles De Gaulle, former French President
"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country."
- Marion Barry, Washing, D.C. Mayor
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
- Dan Quayle, U.S. Vice President
"Is this chicken what I have, or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says Chicken, by the Sea"-Jessica Simpson
"I make Jessica Simpson look like a rock scientist"-Tara Reid
"I think that the film "Clueless" was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness."-Alicia Silverstone
This one is disturbing!
"Too many obgyn's aren't able to practice their love with women across this country."-George Bush
"I think that gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman."-Arnold Schwarzanegger
"I get to go overseas places, like Canada"-Britney Spears
"So, where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?"-Christina Aguilera
"I love California. I grew up in Phoenix."-Dan Quayle
"Do I have a large frog in my hair? I have the sensation that something is eating my brain"-Joaquin Phoenix
"I find it a bid sad that there is no photo of me at the museum at Checkpoint Charlie."-David Hasselfhoff
"What's Walmart, do they sell like wall stuff?"-Paris Hilton
"The Internet is a great way to get on the Net."-Bob Dole
"I feel my best when I'm happy."-Winona Ryder
Of course I couldn't resist adding a few Bushism's.
"I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican" -Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"The future will be better tomorrow." -Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country." -George W. Bush, Jr.
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls." -Governor George W. Bush, Jr
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure." -George W. Bush, Jr.
"I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future." -Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating." George W. Bush
"Sometimes when I sleep at night I think of 'Hop on Pop.'" George W. Bush
"There's nothing more deep than recognizing Israel's right to exist. That's the most deep thought of all. ... I can't think of anything more deep than that right." George W. Bush
"I think we can agree. The past is over."
"I have learned from mistakes I may or may not have made."
"It was just inebreating what the Midlands was all about then." (A
slip on exhillerating)
"It's clearly the budget. It has a lot of numbers on it."
"The most important job is not to be governor, or first lady in my case."
"Will highways on the internet become more few?"
"Like your neighbor just like you like to be liked yourself."
"Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning? Laura and I really
don't realize just how bright our children is."
"I was raised in the West. The West of Texas. It's pretty close to
California. More so than Washington, D.C. is close to California."
"I propose that every city have a telephone number 119 -- for dyslexics who
have an emergency."
"There ought to be limits to freedom." Said about parody websites of him.
"I believe that we are on an irreversible trent toward democracy and more
freedom-but that could change."
"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared.'"
"Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."
"Illegitimacy is something we should talk about, in terms of not having it."
"We are ready for any unseen event that may or may not occur."
"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
"We have a firm commitment to NATO; we are a part of NATO. We have a firm
commitment to Europe; we are a part of Europe."
"Who is to blame for riots? The rioters are to blame."
"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in
this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in
this century."
"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children."
"It isn't pollution that's ruining the environment; it's all the impurities
in the air and water that's doing it."
"It's time the human race entered the solar system."
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."
- Miss Alabama, 1994 Miss USA Pageant
"Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researches also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are."
- Mat Lauer, Today Show, NBC
"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law."
- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.
"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."
- Brooke Shields
"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president."
- Hillary Clinton
"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."
- Charles De Gaulle, former French President
"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country."
- Marion Barry, Washing, D.C. Mayor
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
- Dan Quayle, U.S. Vice President
"Is this chicken what I have, or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says Chicken, by the Sea"-Jessica Simpson
"I make Jessica Simpson look like a rock scientist"-Tara Reid
"I think that the film "Clueless" was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness."-Alicia Silverstone
This one is disturbing!
"Too many obgyn's aren't able to practice their love with women across this country."-George Bush
"I think that gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman."-Arnold Schwarzanegger
"I get to go overseas places, like Canada"-Britney Spears
"So, where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?"-Christina Aguilera
"I love California. I grew up in Phoenix."-Dan Quayle
"Do I have a large frog in my hair? I have the sensation that something is eating my brain"-Joaquin Phoenix
"I find it a bid sad that there is no photo of me at the museum at Checkpoint Charlie."-David Hasselfhoff
"What's Walmart, do they sell like wall stuff?"-Paris Hilton
"The Internet is a great way to get on the Net."-Bob Dole
"I feel my best when I'm happy."-Winona Ryder
Of course I couldn't resist adding a few Bushism's.
"I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican" -Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"The future will be better tomorrow." -Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country." -George W. Bush, Jr.
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls." -Governor George W. Bush, Jr
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure." -George W. Bush, Jr.
"I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future." -Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating." George W. Bush
"Sometimes when I sleep at night I think of 'Hop on Pop.'" George W. Bush
"There's nothing more deep than recognizing Israel's right to exist. That's the most deep thought of all. ... I can't think of anything more deep than that right." George W. Bush
"I think we can agree. The past is over."
"I have learned from mistakes I may or may not have made."
"It was just inebreating what the Midlands was all about then." (A
slip on exhillerating)
"It's clearly the budget. It has a lot of numbers on it."
"The most important job is not to be governor, or first lady in my case."
"Will highways on the internet become more few?"
"Like your neighbor just like you like to be liked yourself."
"Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning? Laura and I really
don't realize just how bright our children is."
"I was raised in the West. The West of Texas. It's pretty close to
California. More so than Washington, D.C. is close to California."
"I propose that every city have a telephone number 119 -- for dyslexics who
have an emergency."
"There ought to be limits to freedom." Said about parody websites of him.
"I believe that we are on an irreversible trent toward democracy and more
freedom-but that could change."
"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared.'"
"Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."
"Illegitimacy is something we should talk about, in terms of not having it."
"We are ready for any unseen event that may or may not occur."
"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
"We have a firm commitment to NATO; we are a part of NATO. We have a firm
commitment to Europe; we are a part of Europe."
"Who is to blame for riots? The rioters are to blame."
"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in
this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in
this century."
"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children."
"It isn't pollution that's ruining the environment; it's all the impurities
in the air and water that's doing it."
"It's time the human race entered the solar system."
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Margie Maldonado on -
ROFLOL
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Permalink Reply by Dancing Wind Designs on
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I also remember a quote from eiither Jessica Simpson or Britney Spears about how the Sec. of the Interior did a great job decorating the White House.
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Permalink Reply by Linhorra on
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"If Lincoln were alive today, he'd be turning over in his grave."
~Gerald Ford
"I watch a lot of baseball on the radio."
~Gerald Ford
"Things are more like they are today than they ever have been."
~Gerald Ford
"Zebras don't change their spots."
~Al Gore
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Permalink Reply by LaTrice M Towns on
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Bush scares me and cracks me up at the same time.
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